Day 51

The 16th August. Exactly one week to go. It is now becoming real. I can feel the Great Wave starting to bear down on me. I have been reflecting on how I have handled things so far. I have rejected much well-intentioned advice on positive thinking, keeping so busy I am distracted and being determined to get back into active life as quickly as possible.

Tomorrow I have my pre-operative assessment at Rugby St Cross Hospital. It is strange to be having another assessment so soon after the last. Strange also since I feel well now the surface tumour has been removed. But the thought of not seeing another August is sobering – the unseen killer still lurks. Suddenly the weekend with my family and friends seems a long time ago.

The TV adverts run by a cancer charity make sense now. The first emphasising that someone with cancer is still a father, uncle, colleague, sportsperson etc is still just that is important.  An individual cannot be defined by this disease. And after all, its not contagious. The second one showing how lonely a cancer diagnosis can make you feel is also absolutely correct.  Despite the love and support I feel, this is something which no-one else can really share. The adverts must have been devised by an insider!!